Offense never lets you go – you have to let it go.— Joyce Meyer
And I plead with Euodia and Syntyche to settle their disagreement and be restored with one mind in our Lord. I would like my dear friend and burden-bearer to help resolve this issue, for both women have diligently labored with me for the prize and helped in spreading the revelation of the gospel, along with Clement and the rest of my coworkers. All of their names are written in the Book of Life.
Philippians 4:2-3 TPT
Offence is a common challenge in human interactions, magnified within the nuances of Christian life. From the subtle misunderstandings between early church members like Syntyche and Euodia to the outright rejections and mockeries faced by Jesus Himself, the Bible provides profound insights into the nature of offences, their origins, and the spiritually mature ways to handle them.
In the Christian community at Philippi, two women, Syntyche and Euodia, experienced a conflict so significant that it merited the attention of the Apostle Paul, who implored them to reconcile and be "of the same mind in the Lord" (Philippians 4:2). This incident highlights early examples of how personal grievances can escalate and disrupt communal harmony.
The term "offence" in the New Testament is often translated from the Greek skandalizo, referring to a snare or stumbling block. It is metaphorically used for situations or actions that entrap or cause someone to sin through anger or resentment. This concept is encapsulated in Jesus’ warnings about causing others to stumble (Matthew 18:6-7) and also reflected in His interactions, where He often offended the Pharisees with His radical, truth-telling ministry (Matthew 15:12).
Offences arise for several reasons, such as personal rejections, confrontations with uncomfortable truths that challenge our self-perception or beliefs, and misunderstandings about people's actions. Additionally, unmet expectations, jealousy, envy of the success of others, and bruised egos tied to our pride can easily lead to feelings of offence and provoke bitterness.
When offences are not addressed, they can destroy unity, as seen in the disunity among church members like Syntyche and Euodia. They also hinder our ability to receive spiritual or material blessings, as Jesus’ restricted miracles in Nazareth on account of his townspeople's unbelief demonstrates (Mark 6:5). Offence can poison the spirit, leading to malicious behaviours and even greater sins like hatred and murder. Offences can propagate through communities, causing widespread division and strife.
The Bible provides guidance on how to deal with offences by building a solid identity in Christ and practicing forgiveness as Christ taught and exemplified. To foster reconciliation, we should live conscious of God's forgiveness and quickly forgive others as Christ admonished (Matthew 6:14-15). By emulating Christ’s humility and appreciating that God allows events for our ultimate good, we can mitigate feelings of personal attack and betrayal (Genesis 50:20, Romans 8:28). Moreover, as we learn to love others despite their actions or attitudes, we dissolve the grounds for offence.
Offences, if left unchecked, threaten to undermine our individual faith and the collective integrity of Christian fellowship. The stories of Syntyche and Euodia, as well as numerous teachings of Jesus, emphasize the need for a proactive, grace-filled response to offences.
By responding in love, humility, and forgiveness, we open the path to healing and unity, which are crucial for fulfilling God's will and manifesting His kingdom on Earth. This approach not only helps us manage our interactions but also deepens our spiritual maturity, transforming potential stumbling blocks into stepping stones toward greater spiritual impact.